How to Say I Love You: A Guide by Han Solo
by SmugglerofSass
Summary: Or: How to fall hopelessly in love with the Last Princess of Alderaan.


Originally written for the Han/Leia Winter Exchange for my giftee erma-w. Look I wrote a real fic, or something resembling it. The prompts come from a list of ways your otp might say "I love you" so let's just pretend for a moment that Han is a little more open about his feelings in the year or so leading up to ESB and that I didn't use the phrase "after all" quite as much as I actually did. Enjoy!

* * *

 _As a hello_

You haven't seen her in weeks, but Goddess is she a gorgeous sight when she comes to your rescue. Well, she's not the only one rescuing you but she's the one your words are meant for.

"Do you greet everyone who comes to save your ass like that Flyboy." Only the gorgeous ones, you tell her but then she is pressing a blaster into your hands and the time for flirting is gone, you just hope the kid doesn't tell the other Rogues about this exchange.

 _Over a cup of tea_

The sun is finally breaking in the sky and you have made it through the night. The steam from her cup rises in the air, catching the light and you think she has never looked more beautiful. The words fall from your lips, unthinking, gruff, quick. She closes her eyes, whispers your name, reminding you of what you already know; this isn't the time or place, you can't do this, you're leaving, you'll both get hurt, and yet-

-and yet the words are truer each and every time you say them. You knew you weren't going to make it out unscathed anyway.

 _Over a beer bottle_

It's one of the Rogues' parties and you've snatched a couple of ales and tucked yourselves away in a corner to watch the revelers. She's talking about how the parties are so necessary for lifting everyone's spirits- She's so passionate about the cause and that makes you love her that much more and you've had just enough alcohol to say those words with no fear. She blushes, shakes her head, tells you you're drunk but you know the truth about how she feels.

 _On a sunny Tuesday afternoon, the late sunlight glowing in your hair_

Yet another Rebellion mission has brought you to a world seemingly untouched by the war. You sit together in a tapcaf, playing the part of a young couple and you're intrigued by the way the sunlight hits her hair, bringing out colors you've never even noticed and-

"You know, Sweetheart, I'm beginning to think I'm in love with you."

She smiles gently and returns the sentiment, sure it's part of the ruse, sure you wouldn't be saying it if you were talking to the Princess she is every other day. And that's where she's wrong, because your words are directed at the strong Rebel leader, not the carefree young woman she's pretending to be, but for now you'll allow her to think it's part of an act, one day you'll tell her the truth.

 _When baking chocolate chip cookies_

She's mentioned chocolate probably a hundred times in the past months, missing the taste and home. You can't resist buying a bunch when you're off base next time and it's worth it to see her eyes light up when you return. You convince her to take the evening off so you can bake cookies. She sways to the music on the radio as you make the batter and you can't help but say how much you love her. She says you're bluffing, snatching a handful of chocolate from the counter but you know she's not entirely sure she's right.

 _To someone else_

Chewie is not stupid, he's noticed the looks and the hushed conversations, hears you berate yourself and notices the things you seek out for her on runs. Chewie has known the longest of anyone so when he questions it you don't hesitate to admit it. When he asks what you intend to do you don't know what to tell him, after all you've been planning to leave for months.

 _With a shuddering gasp_

You lay on the deck plates together, lucky to be alive, when it roles off your tongue. After all, if it weren't for her you would be lying dead in a gutter about now. She brushes you off and reminds you that you need to get moving, need to get off the planet but for the moment you watch the rise and fall of her chest as you both try to catch your breath.

 _When we lay together on the fresh spring grass_

It's spring and the market is full of fresh fruit and you have successfully accomplished you mission and you decide that you all deserve to celebrate before you return to the frozen hell of Hoth. You sit under a tree together, a short distance from Chewie and the kid even though Chewie knows exactly what's going on and you're pretty sure the kid isn't blind either. She laughs when the fruit juice rolls down you chin and carefully leans forward to kiss it from your lips. It's far more forward than you expected with the others around and you can't help it. She shakes her head and says, "I'm only here for the fruit, flyboy." You take another bite in response.

 _Loud, so everyone can hear_

You shout it across the hanger at her retreating back and you can practically hear the money changing hands, but you just don't care anymore. You're tired of the games and the denials and you wish she would just admit what you both know already. You watch her freeze, expecting her to explode at you but instead her shoulders hunch forward, her head bows and she flees.

 _Over and over again, till it's nothing but a senseless babble_

The fever brings delirium, nightmares and senseless babble. Partway through the night it becomes your mantra, the Corellian words slurring on your tongue while she and Chewie keep watch. In the morning you don't remember a word.

 _When the broken glass litters the floor_

She's curled around a small child, still shaking from the explosion. Once you deem it clear she scoops up the child and runs to the refugee transport, delivering the child back to her mother's arms. Later, while waiting on Chewie to pick you up you wrap her in a hug whispering the she's strong and that you love her over and over. When you finally board the Falcon, her back is straight, and her head is up again and you know she believed every word you said.

 _From very far away_

The comm crackles, cutting in and out and you can imagine her, tucked in a corner of the Command Center, headset over those gorgeous braids, a slightly exasperated look on her face as she listens to you check in from systems away. You ask if she's had anything to eat today other than caf and listen to her stutter for a moment before you cut her off saying "don't want the people I love to starve if I can help it, I've been there before, you know?" She stops in her tracks before promising to head to mess for something to eat. Before she cuts the connection, she makes you promise to get back to base on time. You promise, after all you'll do almost anything she asks.

 _With no space left between us_

You're on your way to Bespin, two and a half weeks into your unplanned adventure when you say it for the first time since you started sleeping together. It comes out in your native Corellian and you're convinced she doesn't hear because you're sure she's asleep. Next to you her lips curl in a small smile that you don't notice. She will treasure this in the six months to come.

 _Muffled, from the other side of the door_

"Go away Captain!" It's the anniversary of Alderaan and she has locked herself away in her quarters which you think is the absolute worst idea, so you appoint yourself sentry and sit outside her door, talking to her if only for the occasional question as to whether you're finished. Not a chance is your answer every time until it's late and you find yourself telling her about your mother.

"I think she would've loved you. _I_ love you," you say. She opens the door finally and offers you a drink from the bottle of wine on her desk. You take the bottle to the observation deck and drink and watch the stars together until she falls asleep against you shoulder. "My mam definitely would've loved you," you whisper to her sleeping form.

 _A taunt, with one eyebrow raised and a grin bubbling at your lips_

"Don't you know I love you?" you tease, leaning against the doorway of the bunk room. You're sure Chewie is sick of you both no matter how happy he is for you. There's still a long way to Bespin and he's got to be over it now. You, however, are not.

You watch her eyes light with fire before, "into bed, Flyboy," she demands, following close on your heels. You're both already undressing before she can get the hatch closed.

 _Slowly, the words dripping from your tongue like honey_

The moon is high in the sky, shining through the window creating patterns across the bed. It is your only night on Bespin, your only chance to luxuriate in a large bed in each other's company. The sheet lays draped around your waists and she is tracing patterns on your arms and across your chest.

"Still love you," you offer but her lips turn into a small frown. "You're still leaving," she returns. You lean forward to catch her in a kiss, if only to erase the downcast look from her face. You have to pay off Jabba, you both know that, but you haven't left yet so you figure you might as well enjoy all the time you have left with her.

 _In awe, the first time you realized it_

"I think I love her." 'Course you do, is the kid's reply. He's sitting next to you, in the copilot seat, helping with some of the rewiring, repairs which you are ignoring as you watch the Princess give orders in the hanger below. You guess it makes sense that the kid knows it too, after all-

"Hey, wait a minute, what do you mean-"

 _On a post-it note_

It's Lover's Day and it seems most everyone on base has someone and she's gone the whole day hoping against hope-

You're off base and knew you would be so you entrusted the kid with something for her to remind her she's not alone. She finds it that evening on the night stand in her quarters, a note in your bold, scrawling letters tucked between the canister of caf and the container of new hairpins. She tucks the note away but makes a home for the spring of dried flowers in a glass on her nightstand. You'll find a thank you note stuck to the Falcon's dash after you return.

 _As a goodbye_

The fumes are rising around you and you know it's now or never but for once she doesn't shy away from the words you have been using for years, instead she shouts them across the chamber, heedless of stormtroopers and bounty hunters and the literal Harbinger of Death himself. But now is not the time for you to return her words verbatim because she has heard them a thousand times, instead it's your turn to reassure her that you've known all along.

 _As a thank you_

You're lying in the med center and while it's really the last thing you want, you're here because she insisted the medics check you over, scared to lose you to some unknown, unnoticed side effect of the carbonite. She's in a chair pulled close to your bed, catching up on Alliance intel while they wait on you wait on test results. When the medic returns he proclaims a full recovery in your future and then she is in your arms, hugging you, so happy you're going to survive and you're whispering "I love you" over and over against her skin and you mean "thank you for saving me and bringing me back from the dead" but you know she understands exactly what you mean because she has spent months longing to hear those words again.

 _With a hoarse voice, under the blankets_

The beds in the Ewok huts are small, hell the huts are small but that's not what's on your mind when you pull her closer to you. The words come quick and hoarse and you ignore the sting in your eyes because you can't possibly be that scared of losing her.

But you are because you're in charge here, in charge of everyone's safety and she's already disappeared once on you and if you lose her tomorrow-

She tucks her head against your chest, repeating your words and promising that you won't lose each other again, and for tonight that is enough.

 _As a promise_

The Battle of Endor is over and celebratory bonfires are burning all over the forest. The two of you have found a corner where you can watch the revelers without being seen and you are reminded of a party years before. She's tucked safely against your side when she mentions she never thought she'd see this day, the Fall of the Empire, the culmination of years of work, a starting point for moving forward. You know what she means, after all, you never saw a brighter future in store for you but now it's there before you and you're going after it together. This time, when you say the words, they're a promise for your future together, no matter what. And she knows.


End file.
